“Hey, it’s the festival of Sinterklaas today.”
“What’s that?”
“Sinterklaas is a legendary saint. He’s the Dutch version of Santa Claus. He’s dressed like a bishop and has a golden staff in his hand. He comes from Spain in a boat.”
“You mean he prefers to spend his winter in Holland instead of Spain? Why?”
“Well, he doesn’t spend all his winter here. He comes on 16th November and leaves on 5th December, when he distributes gifts and sails off to relax on some Spanish beach.”
“I don’t blame him.”
“But while he’s here, he carries a large book in which he writes which children have been good and bad. The good kids receive presents.”
“What happens to the bad kids?”
“Well, traditionally the naughty kids were told that they would be whipped and put into bags and taken back to Spain. However, with advances in modern child psychology, this valuable tradition is lost.”
“Behave badly and win a trip to Spain - where can I sign up for that?”
“Yeah well, when the kids realized they could be naughty and get a holiday in Spain as ‘punishment’, its effectiveness was pretty much reduced. Nowadays, bad children are simply punished by making them sit on Sinterklaas’ lap and sing songs. The event is then videotaped by parents to embarrass them when they get older.”
“So, what gifts do they get?”
“On December 5th Sinterklaas brings the presents. And this is not just limited to the kids. Adults also have a party where they exchange gifts (though they are spared the naughty and nice charade). The gift is usually disguised to give the appearance of something completely different and is accompanied by a poem. The poem serves the singular purpose of embarrassing the recipient by reminding him/her of some embarrassing incidents, exposing their well-kept secrets, and generally mocking their failure of character. The recipient’s humiliation is completed by making him/her open the present in public and reading the poem out loud. This, naturally, leads to great hilarity.”
“So, basically, the idea behind Sinterklaas is to have lots of fun and give presents to each other. An excuse to get your children high on sugar and publicly make fun of your loved ones.”
“Yeah, fun tradition, ain’t it?”
“Definitely.”